Mashka cried herself to sleep last night. Nothing I could say would comfort her. She is in love with a soldier. Even though she's only14, she is very passionate in her likes and loves. She once had a cat who died, and she cried for a whole week. Even when Mama got her a new kitten.
This soldier who has made her so unhappy is the one she made a shirt for, hand-sewn so carefully, with embroidered cuffs and embroidered initials on the collar. He is going away. He won't say where, he's not allowed.
I tried to cheer her up. Usually if I make jokes or funny faces she'll laugh, but not this time.
"I know it's because there will be a war," she said. Her face was pale, and her eyes red from weeping.
"Hush, Marie, my Mashka darling. I only overheard something and that isn't certain. Count Witte said Papa would favor peace."
"Then why," she asked, "are all the guards being transferred, and only the old ones coming here? They are training them, I'm certain. He will be killed! I'll never see him again!"
After that nothing I could say would soothe her. I listened to her sobbing until she finally fell asleep.
Then I was thinking about my own frinds, the soldiers I knew. Most of them not very well. They treat me like a little sister. All except for one, and I can't talk about him to anyone. If there is war, will he go too? Will he have to fight, even though he is so young? I hadn't thought about it until Mashka raised the possibility with what she said.
Now I can't sleep.
Saturday, February 13, 2010
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